Dark Side of the Sun
by xxX-VioletFire-Xxx
Summary: When Zuko receives a letter from his father with details of his mother's location, the Gaang sets out to find her. But what happens along the way will change everything forever. Zutara/after-finale fic
1. Chapter 1

Dark Side of the Sun

One

Katara finally pulled away to catch her breath, smiling shakily, her heart pounding. Aang looked like he was caught halfway between terrified and ecstatic. His cheeks flushed red when they made eye contact, and he grinned sheepishly.

"Wow." He finally managed. Katara laughed. He watched her.

"So…" Katara laughed again, nervously smoothing her hair.

"So."

After a few seconds, Aang leaned forward and kissed Katara with renewed confidence. She was shocked at his determination as he slipped his arms around her neck and pulled her closer to him, never hesitating. She considered resisting, but didn't.

At the same time, Mai was stroking Zuko's face. He smiled, pleased, and gazed at her.

"You look beautiful." He said.

"You said that already."

"I know. I just thought I'd say it again."

"…"

"What, is that a crime? I said you looked beautiful. What more do you want?"

"Nothing." She moved closer to him. "Just be quiet and kiss me already."

He did.

They leaned back onto the couch. Mai laid he head on his chest, and he put his arm around her shoulders. There was a long silence. Zuko stared out the open window, trying to think of something to say.

"The moon's, ah…really pretty tonight."

Mai lifted her head, looked out the window, and turned to him.

"So?"

"So nothing. I thought girls liked that sort of thing."

"Maybe stupid girls." She muttered, putting her head back on his chest. Zuko suddenly felt a strong sense of Déjà vu.

"It feel so weird being here. I mean, yesterday we were enemies of this place, and now…" Katara trailed off, staring out over the edge of the cliff that overlooked what used to be the Fire Nation. It's flags still fluttered in the wind above the factories, but the cold-hearted spirit was gone. In the distance, the sun was setting over the ocean. The remains of Fire Navy ships floated in the water and washed up on the beach, now scraps of metal and deserted weapons.

"I know what you mean," Sokka replied. He and the rest of the Gaang were there, watching as earthbenders buried the ruins.

Zuko sat down on a rock and didn't say anything. Katara glanced over at him. "What's wrong?"

He turned to face the landscape. "It's just…I'm Firelord now. I'm in charge of all of this. But--" He shook his head. "What is this now? The Fire Nation's been defeated. Being in charge of it is hardly something to be proud of."

"What, so you'd rather the Fire Nation still going strong?" Sokka asked sarcastically. Zuko shot him a look.

"That's not what I meant."

"Well, what did you mean, Mr. High and Mighty?"

"I just--don't think I really want to be Firelord."

"Don't be stupid." Mai said flatly. "Of course you do."

Zuko tensed. "I don't think so."

Mai snorted and looked away. "Suit yourself."

Zuko looked annoyed, but didn't respond. Katara noticed him favoring the spot where Azula had hit him.

"Is that still hurting you?" She asked. Zuko realized she was talking to him and glanced up.

"What? No. No, it's--"

"Here." Katara walked over to him and pulled her bending water from her pouch. Hesitantly, Zuko undid his shirt. Katara felt Aang's eyes on her, but tried to ignore him. After all, it wasn't as if she liked Zuko. He'd saved her life, and she was grateful for that. But nothing more than grateful.

Nothing more than grateful, she thought, as she eased the water over his burn. He shut his eyes, breathing slowly, his bare chest rising to meet her fingers. Katara could feel her cheeks flush.

What was going on? She quickly pulled away. Zuko opened his eyes, watching her.

"Is--is that better?" Katara asked breathlessly. He nodded. She quickly stood and backed away. Aang was still watching her, suspiciously. She smiled at him, and he seemed to relax.

"How did Zuko get injured?" Aang asked, discreetly taking Katara's hand. Zuko looked at her.

"My sister--"

"Oh." Aang nodded, satisfied. "Azula. Right. Well," He stretched his arms upward, yawning widely. "I'm going to bed. Katara?"

"Ahh…not right now." Katara said pointedly, a bit annoyed at the way Aang had acted as if they'd be sleeping in the same room. She'd only kissed him, after all. That wasn't some kind of lifelong commitment.

"'Kay." Aang walked off. Toph followed him.

"Yeah, I'm gonna turn in too." She mumbled. "Long day. Kicked a lot of Fire Nation butt."

Sokka laughed. He and Suki walked in as well, leaving Katara with Zuko and Mai.

"So." Mai said to Katara. This was, in fact, the fist time she'd acknowledged Katara since she'd joined the Gaang. Katara smiled.

"So." She echoed. Zuko stretched.

"That was a long day." He said, agreeing with Toph. Katara nodded.

"Yeah."

There was a long, awkward silence. Mai glared at Katara as if to say get out of here we have things to do. Katara took the hint and followed the others inside. Behind her, she heard whispering, a giggle, and then silence.

She refused to look back.


	2. Chapter 2

Dark Side of the Sun

Dark Side of the Sun

Two

Early the next morning, Katara woke up, splashed her face with cold water, and set out to gather enough food for breakfast. To her surprise, she found a platter of pastries and a pitcher of milk waiting on the kitchen table. It was then that she remembered she no longer had to search for food. The war was over, and now she had people who did that for her.

"You're up early." Someone said. Katara jumped and whipped around. Zuko was sitting in a chair near the end of the table, sipping a cup of black coffee and looking exhausted.

"Zuko? What're you--"

"I couldn't sleep." He explained.

"Oh." Katara's stomach tightened. "What, did Mai keep you up?"

The question came out much sharper than she'd meant it to. Zuko's eyebrows shot up. "Did I do something?"

"No. Sorry. I'm just tired." Katara ran her fingers through her hair and turned to leave. "I'm going back to bed."

"Okay. And no."

"No what?"

"No, Mai didn't keep me up."

Katara paused, nodded, and walked back to her room, where she collapsed onto her bed. She closed her eyes, exhausted.

But for some reason, sleep was suddenly impossible.

At breakfast, three hours later, Katara couldn't help but feel as if she was being watched. Still, every time she looked up, everyone was eating, paying no attention to her. She figured Aang might be sneaking glances at her, so she smiled at him. He looked surprised, but responded with a huge grin a split second later.

"What?" Zuko asked suddenly. Mai was glaring at him from across the table. There was a thud, and Zuko winced in pain. "Ow! What the hell was that for?" He rubbed his shin gingerly.

"Don't play innocent with me." Mai said, more than a hint of anger in her words. She stood up and stalked out of the room. Zuko looked around the table nervously, then got up to follow her.

They watched him leave. A few seconds later, Mai shouted "Keep your eyes on your own girlfriend, Zuko!". A door slammed. Zuko re-emerged, scowling. He grabbed his robe and stormed out the front door. Katara felt Iroh's eyes on her, and she glanced over at him. He was scrutinizing her as he would a new kind of tea.

"I don't feel well." Katara said quickly, pushing herself away from the table. Aang leapt up.

"What's wrong? Are you sick? Is it something you ate? Are you dizzy or anything? Do you think you're going to faint? Should I call a doctor?"

"Jeez, Twinkletoes. Let her breathe." Toph laughed. "She's probably just ticked off that Zuko left."

Both Katara and Aang whipped around to look at her. "What's that supposed to mean?!"

Toph held up her hands in mock surrender. "Whoa. Easy there. Don't get all spazzy at me."

"Why would I care that Zuko left!?" Katara exclaimed, aware that her face was burning and that she was talking way too loudly.

"Yeah! Why would she care?" Aang demanded.

"I don't know. Ask Katara. It's her mind."

Aang turned to face Katara. "What? What did I miss? Is it him?" His face contorted with fury. "Are you in love with Zuko?!"

"Aang, you're making a scene." Katara whispered, very conscious of the fact that everyone in the room was staring at them.

"Answer me, Katara! Are you??"

"I--"

Aang grabbed Katara's shoulders. "You can't be in love with him! I won't let you!"

"Let go of me!" Katara yelled, pushing him off. There was a long, tense silence. Then Katara grabbed her own robe and copied Zuko, slamming the door behind her.

Within seconds, Aang's hysteria died. He sunk to his knees. "What did I do? I yelled at her. I shouldn't have yelled at her. I'm such an idiot."

"Yep." Toph agreed, propping her feet up on the table and folding her hands behind her neck. "Just think, now she and Zu-Zu are all alone out there together, probably in some deserted alleyway where no one'd think to--"

"SHUT UP, TOPH!" Aang yelled. It was too horrible to think about. Katara was his. HIS. Not Zuko's. He couldn't steal her away.

"Why, he's like a brother to me!"

"I said I was confused!"

But she'd kissed him. That was her choice. She loved him.

She loved him.

She loved him.

…Didn't she?

Katara stormed down the street, fuming. What the hell was wrong with Aang? Toph said one stupid thing and he flew off the handle? Who did that? And what gave him the right to talk to her like that, like she was his property or something? Aang was normally such a sweet kid. Why did his whole demeanor change any time Zuko was mentioned?

Katara hit the long brick wall that ran along the side street in frustration, achieving nothing but a bruise along the side of her palm.

Finally, she stopped, realizing that she had no idea where she was or where she was going. A dark storm cloud blocked most of the sunlight, and the street was, consequently, darker than it should have been. Most of the shops were closed or run down, their wooden signs swaying in the wind.

Katara rubbed her arms, suddenly cold. A chill had crept into the air, and she thought it was probably going to rain. She spotted someone in a dark, hooded robe up ahead and called out "Hello? Excuse me?"

The hooded figure turned around.

"Katara?"

"Zuko?" She jogged up to him, ducking under an overhang as it started to drizzle. He joined her, lowering his hood.

"What're you doing out here? Did you follow me?" He asked. She shook her head.

"Do you know where we are?"

Zuko paused, looking around. "Not really. I always stayed up by the palace when I was still the Prince, so I never really came down here."

"So…we're lost. Great." Katara glanced at the shops, hoping one would be open so they could ask for directions.

It started to rain harder, and it became clear that the street had been abandoned for some time. Zuko sat down on the step, and Katara sat next to him.

"What do we do now?"

There was a flash of lightning, quickly followed by a roll of thunder. Katara groaned. "This is bad. We're going to be stuck in this storm for hours." She turned to Zuko, but he was gone. "Zuko?" She looked around.

He was on his feet, pressed against the door, not moving. His face was pale, and he'd broken out in a sweat.

"What's wrong?" Katara stood. There was another flash of lightning, and Zuko tensed, squeezing his eyes shut and digging his nails into the wood. "Zuko?"

Katara was well aware that there was something seriously wrong. Zuko was pressing his forehead to the door, muttering something under his breath. Another flash of lightning made him sink to his knees, burying his face in his hands.

Without thinking, Katara bent the rain around her into a dagger that she thrust through the window of the shop. It shattered. She pulled Zuko through it, into a dark room. He stumbled, and she grabbed his arm to steady him.

"Zuko?" She led him to a chair. He sat down, breathing heavily. After a few seconds, he spoke.

"Lightning--" He managed to say, although it was hard to understand him because his teeth were chattering so hard. Katara stared at him. "Azula--and--and you--"

"Is this because she hit you?"

He shook his head. "No. No, she almost killed--she almost--" He took a deep breath. "You almost--"

"She almost killed me."

He nodded. Katara felt, for some reason, a deep pleasure with the fact that Zuko had gotten so worked up over the fact that she'd almost died.

"Did she, now?" Someone said. Katara jumped, whipping around. An old woman was hunched over a small table in the back, a pipe dangling from her shriveled lips. She had a dark mole on her right cheek, directly under her large nose.

"I--sorry, we--" Katara backed away, mildly disturbed by the woman's menacing appearance. The woman glared at her.

"Let me see your hand." She crooked a finger at her, motioning towards the back of the shop. Katara nervously made her way over. The woman took her hand and turned it over, tracing Katara's palm with her long nail. "Let's see…Aha." She grinned. "You have a lover, no?"

"Um--kind of?"

"Yes well, you have a hesitant future with him." The woman stated matter-of-factly. Katara bit her lip, wondering what that meant.

"Ah! Yes, of course. There is someone else in your heart." She then murmured a few things quietly to herself, her eyebrows arching. She finally let Katara's hand fall and looked up at her. "This is both your fortune and your choice: When you come to a crossroads, consider both paths. The light side is clear, but lacks mystery. The dark side is shadowed, but on it lie many secrets. You must decide for yourself if you are willing to risk the dark--for the secrets may be greater or more terrible than any--or take the light, where you know you are safe."

"I…" Katara was stunned.

"Take the main road straight until you reach the bathhouse. Turn left there, and walk 3 streets over."

It took Katara a minute to realize that the woman had stopped prophesizing, and that she had in fact given her directions.

"Mai?"

"What do you want, Zuko?"

"Why were you so angry at me this morning?"

Mai sighed. "It's called the second door on your left. Goodnight."

Confused, Zuko left her room and walked to the door she'd mentioned. It was shut. He cracked it open and glanced in. Katara was fast asleep on her bed. Her hair was loose around her face, and it fluttered every time she breathed. She looked beautiful, but Zuko's heart sank. Mai knew.

He quickly shut the door, only to find Aang staring him down.

"Listen to me." Aang shoved a finger at Zuko's chest. "You stay away from her. She's mine. You hear that? Mine."

"I know, I was just--wrong door, you know." Zuko stammered, knowing his excuse was pathetic but unable to think of a better one.

"Yeah. I know." Aang said flatly. Then he pushed past Zuko and stormed down the hall. Zuko stared at Mai's closed door.

When you come to a crossroads, consider both paths

He turned and made his way to his room.


	3. Chapter 3

Dark Side of the Sun

Dark Side of the Sun

Three

Zuko laid on his back, considering what Aang had said. He talked about Katara as if she was his property. Zuko wondered what had gone on between them. It was obvious that they were a couple; Zuko just didn't know why. What did she see in Aang?

Frustrated, Zuko rolled over onto his stomach and yelled into his pillow. Katara wasn't even interested in him! He needed to stop thinking about her. Suddenly overcome by the feeling of being watched, he lifted his head and looked towards the doorway. Aang was standing in it, glaring at him.

"I thought you were going to bed," Zuko said dryly.

Aang looked annoyed. "I never said that."

"Whatever," Zuko answered, turning onto his side, his back to the door. Aang sighed and walked away, leaving Zuko irritated and angry.

Meanwhile, Katara was wide awake, remembering what Aang had said earlier, and again a few minutes ago. He kept referring to her as 'his,' and it was really starting to bother her. She didn't belong to anyone. Kissing Aang didn't give him the right to order her around.

Maybe all this 'Avatar' stuff was going to his head, she thought. But still, he wasn't always like that. He was fine most of the time, but whenever anyone mentioned Zuko-- or, usually, Zuko and her-- it was as if his whole personality changed.

He was jealous; that much was obvious. Katara just didn't know why. Well, there was Zuko's total smexxiness and mysterious emo personality, but other than that, she couldn't see anything to be jealous of.

Katara laughed to herself, even though she knew it wasn't funny. She shouldn't have kissed him if she was going to go falling for other guys the next day. At this, she stopped laughing.

Get a hold of yourself, Katara! She couldn't fall for Zuko. His relationship with Mai was shaky as it was. If Mai found out that, on top of everything, Katara was starting to like Zuko, somebody was going to wake up with a knife in their chest.

And besides, she couldn't do that to Aang. No matter how rude he'd been to her, he was still just a kid, and she wasn't about to break his heart like that. Zuko was probably just a passing infatuation. Katara would simply keep quiet about it.

For now.

Zuko stared at the ceiling, thinking about what he'd said to everyone the night before. Being Fire Lord now, after everything he'd gone through, felt wrong. He would have thought it would make him feel proud--after all, he had the chance to turn his Nation around--but he just felt ashamed. He wasn't the Fire Lord everyone had been waiting for. He was one they resented. Even though the Fire Nation had lost the war, that didn't change their opinion of things--or their opinion of him. To them, he was still a traitor, and they'd hang before they'd listen to him.

"Zuko?" Mai was standing in the room. She sat down next to him, placing a hand on his face. "I'm bored of being mad at you."

She leaned in and kissed him on the mouth. After a few seconds, they pulled apart.

"Do you forgive me?" She asked, smiling.

"Sure." Zuko said, with a hint of resignation in his voice that hadn't been there before.

"This came last night." Aang announced suddenly at breakfast the next morning, holding up a scroll. "A messenger hawk brought it."

Sokka took the scroll, scanned it, and let out a groan. "Great. We've been traveling around like crazy for a year straight, we FINALLY got our mission accomplished, and now we're leaving?"

Aang ignored Sokka. He stared at Zuko, who finally snapped. "What?"

"The letter was supposed to be for you."

Zuko snatched it out of Sokka's hands and read it. His expression changed. "My--mom?" He finished the letter and looked up at the others. "The letter's from my father-- before he went to prison, I asked him where my mom was, and he said he didn't know. Apparently he had one of the guards find out. My mom's at an earth kingdom seaport."

"Yep, better start packing." Toph noted.

"Your mom?" Katara asked, surprised. "But when we were in Ba Sing Sei, you told me you'd lost her in the war."

Aang's nostrils flared, and Katara remembered his contempt for the time she'd spent in prison with Zuko.

"No, she's alive. She just…left. It's complicated." Zuko watched Katara, then Aang. "I haven't seen her since I was nine--"

"Then of course we're going," Katara decided, standing up. Aang folded his arms.

"And how are you and Zuko planning to get there?"

Katara's eyes narrowed. "On…Appa."

"If you're going to take MY bison, I think I get to decide whether or not we're going."

Katara put her hands on her hips. "If you found out where your mother was after eight years, you'd want to see her, wouldn't you?"

Aang shrugged. "I dunno. I never had a mother."

"Well, what if you could see Gyatso?"

Aang was silent. Katara stared him down. "Fine," He finally muttered, getting to his feet. "Everyone get your things together--we're going to the Earth Kingdom."


	4. Chapter 4

Dark Side of the Sun

Dark Side of the Sun

Four

That night, Zuko couldn't sleep. All he could think about was seeing his Mother again. It'd been so long, he'd almost forgotten what she looked like. In his mind, her face was blurred, almost like a dream he'd loved but couldn't remember. Somehow, though, Zuko knew he'd be able to tell who she was the moment he saw her.

And he was going to see her; soon, in fact. Sokka had estimated that the trip would take about a week, what with stopping to set up camp, letting Appa rest, and finding food. A week wasn't that long, Zuko thought. It would go by quickly, and before he knew it, he'd be with his Mom again.

He had no idea how wrong he was.

The next morning was a bit chaotic. Sokka was yelling his plans as he read from a list he'd made the night before, although no one seemed to be listening, so he spoke increasingly louder until Katara finally cracked and screamed at him to shut up. She was already in a bad mood at that point because Toph had snuck into her room in the middle of the night, stolen all her clothes, and put them in Zuko's room, and so she'd had to walk all the way down the hall past everyone (in her underwear). She'd then gone into Zuko's room to get her clothes and he'd woken up and asked her what she was doing going through his drawers, and they were both very tired and Zuko was shirtless, and Toph seemed to think that the idea of them both being half-naked together was quite amusing.

Aang had simply sat at the table and watched. When Katara and Zuko were both properly clothed, they joined him for breakfast. Mai woke up after the whole ordeal (thank god) and slid into the chair next to Zuko's with renewed confidence. Aang then formally apologized to Katara for being an 'overprotective meanie' (his words, not mine), and she forgave him. Then Suki walked out of Sokka's bedroom in a slinky nightgown, spotted everyone staring at her, and discovered she'd overslept.

And so, the week got off to a rather uncomfortable start.

"Are we there yet?" Toph asked flatly.

Appa moaned. They'd been flying all day, and he wasn't the only one getting tired and hungry. Sokka had tied his shirt over his head and was napping, his head resting on Suki's lap. Every few seconds he let out a loud snore. Katara honestly didn't know what the girl saw in him.

Zuko and Mai leaned against the side of the sattle, looking utterly bored.

"I'm bored." Mai said.

"I know," Zuko responded.

"I'm tired."

"I know."

"I'm hungry."

"I know."

"So?"

"So what?"

"So get me some food."

"How?"

"I don't know. Just get me some."

"We're on a giant flying bison. How the hell are we going to get food?"

"So what do we do now?" Aang asked finally. He and Katara were sitting on a boulder across from the other members of the gang. Katara had her head rested in her free hand (Aang was holding the other), and was turned slightly away from him, to face the sunset. They had stopped to let Appa rest, and had just returned from a short hike.

Mai had her arms wrapped around Zuko's waist and was resting her head at the base of his neck. He seemed a bit uncomfortable, and kept glancing around nervously. No one noticed.

"How should I know?" Toph muttered, sitting down on a rock of her own and flicking away a beetle. "You're the leader, aren't you?"

"…Sokka?" Aang asked.

"I'm good with whatever." Sokka replied. Aang turned to Katara, hoping for at least a glance in his direction, but she seemed oblivious to what was going on. Suki noticed Katara's silence and caught Aang's eye.

"Is something wrong?" She asked Aang softly. He looked upset.

"No--I don't know what's bothering her! She's being really, I don't know, distant."

"I can hear you, you know." Katara said dryly, standing up and pulling her hand out of Aang's grasp. She looked around at everyone. "Are we making camp soon? I'm tired."

"Ummm…we weren't planning on it--but okay!" Aang grinned, hoping Katara would look at him, but she just stretched and took one of the tents to set up. "I'll do it!" Aang said eagerly, springing to his feet and taking the tent from Katara. "Where do you want it?"

"I don't really care." Katara turned and watched as the others made to set up. Sokka made a big show of finishing Suki's tent in five minutes flat; Toph found a nice patch of grass; Zuko and Mai stretched a tarp across the frame together.

"I don't think this is big enough for us." Mai said. Katara stiffened. Zuko's eyebrows shot up.

"Us--?" He stammered. Mai stared at him.

"I am your girlfriend, you know."

"Yeah--but--" Zuko glanced around, and locked eyes with Katara. For a second, everything was silent. Zuko rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "I--ah--"

"Suit yourself." Mai said, glaring at him.

Zuko backed away a bit, but when he turned around, he was face-to-face with Katara. She forced a smile. He sighed.

"I know. I'm sorry." He muttered as he made his way past her to get another tent. Surprised, Katara watched him walk away. She wanted to say something more, but--

"Is everything okay?" Aang asked. Katara turned to look at him.

"Yeah. Everything's fine."

"Are you sure? You've been acting really strange lately."

"I told you, I'm tired."

"But before today, too."

"Well, we were fighting." Katara was aware that her voice had a bit of an edge to it. Aang looked a hurt.

"Sorry. Just let me know if you need anything." He replied quietly.

"Sure."

Once Aang was gone, Katara retreated to the tent he'd set up for her. Inside, she found a single rose placed on her blanket. She picked it up, a mixture of sadness and amusement filling her. Aang was a sweet kid, really, but she just didn't--

She let the rose fall onto the blanket and leaned back, putting her hand on her forehead. Why had she kissed him? Why'd she have to go and screw everything up? She'd made a commitment by doing that, and now…

"I know. I'm sorry."

And now she regretted it.


	5. Chapter 5

Dark Side of the Sun

Dark Side of the Sun

Chapter Five

The next day, Katara avoided leaving her tent. Seeing Zuko just made it harder to keep from thinking about him. Aang was still technically still her boyfriend.

Technically.

Katara hated herself. He was such a sweet kid. She'd really thought she'd loved him, but after they'd kissed…it was like all was like all her feelings for him disappeared.

The Gaang skipped breakfast, mostly because Katara slept late and didn't cook it for them. Suki helped her with lunch, using the sparse leftovers from the night before. But for dinner everyone admitted they needed to find more food.

"I'll go," Katara offered, looking for an excuse to get away from camp. Sokka stretched out on a patch of grass.

"That's good, cuz I'm ex-haus-ted."

"Are you ever NOT?" Toph asked.

"You should talk." He mumbled lazily. Suki giggled.

"I'll come with you, if you want." Zuko offered. Mai rolled her eyes but didn't say anything.

"It's okay." Katara forced herself to mutter. Zuko stared at her.

"Are you sure?"

"I think he should go with you." Aang spoke up. Surprised, Katara turned to look at him.

"You do?"

"Yeah. I mean, we don't know who or what might be around here. I'd go, but I--have to feed Appa."

"Oh." Katara hesitated, but Aang didn't seem to be foaming at the mouth or having any other signs of rabies/schizophrenia. She nodded. "Thanks. That's a…good idea."

Zuko quietly followed her on the path leading into the forest, keeping his eyes straight ahead so he wouldn't have to watch Mai glaring at him. It was getting harder and harder to tell whether they were fighting or not. One second she'd be all over him, and the next she'd be shooting daggers with her eyes. He knew she was jealous, but still. She had to know when to say when.

She had to know when to just let it die.

"I can't believe this," Katara groaned. "We've been searching for, what, an hour? And we haven't found anything?"

"Watch it, you're starting so sound like Sokka." Zuko observed.

"Ha ha. Very funny." Katara answered sarcastically, but Zuko caught her smiling out of the corner of his eye. "Wait--" Katara stopped, listening. "Do you hear water?"

"Water?"

"Yeah." Katara cut her way through the trees surrounding the path and quickly disappeared from sight. A few seconds later, she yelled, "I was right!"

Zuko followed her and emerged near a river. Katara had already slipped off her shoes and was in up to her knees, searching the water for fish. Zuko sat down on the bank and watched her. Quietly, she approached something in the water, her hands moving slowly a few inches from the surface. She carefully bent the water into a bubble, enclosing the fish inside, and lifted it into the air in front of her.

"We don't have anywhere to put it!" Zuko called. Katara stared at him.

"If we came out here to look for food, why didn't you bring some kind of basket?"

"Why didn't you?"

There was silence. Then Katara giggled. The fish flopped against the side of the bubble, trying to break free. She waded through the water with it, towards Zuko. "What are we going to do with it?"

"Put it here." Zuko pointed at the ground next to him.

"It'll just roll back in."

"No it won't."

"Yeah it--"

Swiftly, Zuko poked the bubble, grabbed the struggling fish, and blasted it with a handful of fire. Katara winced, watching the toasted fish drop to the ground.

"You killed it." She whispered.

"We were going to anyway."

"But aren't we supposed to--you, know, clean it first? Like, the guts and everything?"

Zuko looked at the fish. "We'll give it to Sokka."

Katara laughed, and Zuko smiled. "Or Toph," She added. "As payback."

"Yeah."

Katara sat down next to Zuko, and they were both quiet, knowing that even though Toph was always teasing them, they were nothing but thankful for it.

"Don't you think we should catch a couple more?" Zuko asked. Katara smiled.

"No." She answered, lying back on the ground.

"Yeah, the rest of us can just starve." Zuko pointed out, grinning. He leaned back on his elbows so that he was next to her, the soft moss tickling his forearms.

After a minute, Katara looked over at him. "You must be excited about seeing your mom again."

"Yeah."

"Why did she--I mean, in Ba Sing Sei you told me you lost her to the Fire Nation. But if she's still alive--"

"My Grandfather was the Firelord at the time. I think he said something to my Father about sacrificing me. That's what Azula said. To teach him how it felt to lose his son. He was going to make my father do it, so my mom--I'm not sure. I just woke up and she was gone. That, and…my grandfather was dead."

Katara hesitated. "She killed him?"

Zuko shrugged. "I don't know. They said he died of natural causes, but I'm not sure that was the truth."

"Wow." Katara stared up the clouds, wondering what she could say to him. "That's…pretty horrible."

"Yeah."

"You already know what happened to my mom," Katara added. "From when you took me to find my mom's killer." She looked at Zuko. "I never really thanked you for that."

"It's okay."

There was another long silence. There always was, with them. Zuko rubbed the bridge of his nose. "So, umm…how long have you been traveling with Aang?"

"A year." Katara answered. "But you know that already."

"I do?"

"You were following us the whole time."

"Oh. Yeah." Zuko was amazed. Had it really been only a year since the day he captured Aang for the first time? It felt like an eternity ago.

"You have something in your hair," Katara said, breaking his train of thought. She reached out and brushed a small leaf out of his hair. Zuko felt a shiver roll down his spine when her fingers touched his skin. She paused, tracing her fingers down to his scar. "I never got to heal this," She said softly.

Zuko's heart started to speed up. This was dangerous. She shouldn't be touching him. He tried to think of Mai, but he couldn't. He couldn't distract himself.

"Katara--" He tried to protest, but his voice sounded strangely hoarse. He felt himself reaching towards her wrist.

"Did you find anything yet?"

With a start, Katara pulled her hand back and quickly moved away from Zuko. Aang was standing a few feet away.

"I thought you were feeding Appa." Katara managed, breathlessly. Aang stared at her.

"I finished, so I figured I'd better come help you."

"You followed us!" Zuko exclaimed angrily. Aang ignored him. He looked down at the roasted fish.

"Is that all you got?"

"We--uhh--" Katara looked to Zuko for help, but he was too busy glaring at Aang. "We forgot to bring a basket, so we couldn't carry the fish."

"So why didn't you just come back to camp and get one?"

"We were going to. We just--took a break."

"Okay." Aang nodded slowly. He and Zuko were still staring each other down. Finally, Zuko got to his feet.

"What?" He snapped. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Why are you?" Aang retorted. Zuko pointed to Katara.

"She's fine, if you haven't noticed! It's not like I was taking her out her so I could kill her or anything."

Aang raised an eyebrow at him.

"WHAT?" Zuko yelled, his temper flaring.

"Nothing."

Furious, Zuko stormed past him, towards the forest. Aang watched him for a second, then turned to Katara. They didn't speak for a minute. When Zuko was finally out of earshot, Aang nervously rubbed the back of his neck. "Katara, can I…ask you something?"

"Sure. What is it?"

Aang hesitated, and suddenly Katara knew what he was about to ask. His eyes darted over her, full of fear and jealousy and determination and hope, all at the same time.

"Katara," He asked quietly, gazing up at her. "Will you marry me?"


	6. Chapter 6

Dark Side of the Sun

Dark Side of the Sun

Chapter six

"I--" Katara couldn't speak. She almost said "yes" out of pure guilt but immediately stopped herself. She did NOT want to marry Aang. She did not want to send out invitations and throw a party and pledge to stay with him "till death do us part". The very idea petrified her.

"I'm fourteen." She finally managed. Aang looked a little panicked.

"Almost fifteen." He said. Katara blinked. She'd forgotten her birthday was in a few weeks. Aang knew more about her than she did.

"--Right. But you're only thirteen, and--"

"I know." His expression fell. "But in a few years--"

"I can't--commit to that,"

He looked heartbroken.

"I'm sorry, but I just can't--I can't. Don't you think we should wait? Until we're, you know, older?"

"No." Aang mumbled.

"But marriage--I mean, that's a lifelong commitment. You're only thirteen. You're not--"

"I'm old enough to know that I'm going to love you for the rest of my life."

Katara felt her heart slowly ripping in half. "Aang, I know you think you will, but--"

"I don't just think I will. I KNOW it." He watched her. "I thought you felt the same way."

"I can't--" Katara looked away. "I don't know."

"That's because you love Zuko."

"It's not!" Katara whipped around to look back at Aang. "Stop saying that!"

"It's true."

"No, it's not. I don't love him."

Aang just looked at her. Katara knew he wanted to believe her, wanted to think she was telling him the truth.

"I wouldn't lie to you." She found herself saying. And then he had his arms around her and they were kissing.

It wasn't anything like the first time. They both knew it. But for some reason, neither pulled away. Maybe it was because Katara wanted to prove she wasn't in love with Zuko. Or because Aang wanted to believe her. Or even because Katara needed to convince herself.

When they finally did break apart, there was a long silence. Aang looked at the ground. A tear rolled down his cheek.

"I'm sorry." He said, his voice cracking.

Katara couldn't respond.

"Where were you?"

Katara looked up, surprised. Zuko had been sitting on the rock in front of her tent, and now he was blocking her from going in.

"In the forest."

"With Aang?

Katara flushed. "All we did was catch a few more fish."

"Oh." Zuko still looked skeptical. "Well, let me know if he tries anything."

Katara looked directly up at him, her expression cold. "He's thirteen. He's not going to try anything." She pushed past Zuko and ducked into her tent. Zuko watched her, barely muttering the word 'sorry' under his breath.

Katara immediately regretted her reaction. She was stuck in a relationship with a guy she didn't even like, and when the one she was in love with tried to protect her, she blew him off!

But she wasn't in love with Zuko. It didn't make sense. All this time, she'd always watched Aang. Loved Aang. Risked her life to help him. She never thought she'd feel that way about Zuko, but…

What had changed?

The image of a streak of blue electricity rushed through her head. She remembered how Zuko had screamed, how he'd leapt in front of it; how after that, everything was blurry and painful. How she couldn't help crying as she kneeled at his side, her heart racing, trying to heal him.

She'd risked her life for Aang, but when it came down to it, Zuko was the one who was there for her.

"What're you thinking about?" Mai asked, rolling onto her side to look at Zuko. She'd dragged him all the way out here, to a moss-covered hill a mile away from camp, and now they were lying on their backs, watching the stars. Well, at least Zuko was. Mai seemed to have other ideas.

"My mom." Zuko answered. He wasn't lying. His mother had been the only thing on his mind (besides from Katara) for the past few days. They were almost to the seaport, which meant that in a day or two's time he'd see her again. He could barely imagine what he'd say to her, let alone what he'd tell her about his scar. He wasn't even sure if she'd want him to live with her or to stay with his friends. Seeing his mom everyday would be incredible…but never seeing Katara would be torture.

"You're going to see her soon." Mai said, leaning closer to Zuko.

"I know."

Mai kissed his softly on the lips, but Zuko turned his head away. "Not right now."

"Why not? We're alone. Your girlfriend isn't here to make you feel guilty."

"She's not my--"

"Whatever, Zuko. If she really wasn't your girlfriend, you'd be kissing me. You'd be thrilled that we had this whole hill to ourselves. You'd want to make it the most romantic night of my life. But instead, you're daydreaming about Katara, who HAS A BOYFRIEND. She's Aang's girlfriend, Zuko. She's in LOVE with Aang!"

"She's not!"

Zuko's exclamation sliced through the silence surrounding them like a knife. Mai stared at him.

"Why do you love her?" She asked quietly.

"Mai, I'm not--I don't--"

"Just tell me why you love her and not me."

"I don't love--"

"ANSWER THE QUESTION!" Mai screamed. Zuko drew back. He hesitated.

"Mai, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"Yeah, that's what you said when you abandoned me in the Fire Nation. So, what, you could go join Aang and Katara and their little gang of heroes? Do you want to be a hero, Zuko? You want to make people happy? You can start with ME!" Her bottom lip shook. "I have loved you my entire life. No matter how many times you rejected me, I always came back. And you--you just left and when you came back for me I thought we'd just continue from where we left off. But something was different. You were different." A tear ran down her face. "Because you--were in love with her! Her and not me! We were together our whole lives but you--spent a couple of WEEKS with her--and it was like I never existed!"

Zuko watched her. He'd never seen Mai cry before. It was like watching an entirely different person unfolding before him. He wanted to tell her she'd been nothing but a rebound from how Katara had rejected him in the Crystal Catacombs, how he never really loved her like he loved Katara, how he was sorry she'd had to go through this.

But he couldn't.

That night, Katara laid awake, waiting for the sound of Zuko's footsteps coming back to his tent. They came blissfully early. Relieved, Katara laid back on her bed and allowed herself to sleep.

She dreamed about a wedding. She was wearing a long white dress, and the man she was marrying was wearing a black suit and a veil that covered most of his face. She somehow knew not to move it until the right point in the ceremony.

Together, they walked to the altar, the dark veil still shading his face from view. The preacher read something from a book. Then he told Katara she could remove the veil.

She reached over and lifted the cloth from the man's face. It was Aang, but he had a deep scar around his eye.

"You're not Zuko!" She was saying, yelling. She looked around at the crowd, but they were all laughing at her. And they all looked the same; all had the same long, shiny black hair and familiar thin eyes.

"You're already married!" One of them yelled out.

Panicked, Katara ran down the stairs from the altar. "Zuko!" She was calling his name, frantically searching for him, but they were all just laughing. Laughing and pointing.

"ZUKO!"

Katara sat straight up in her bed. She was sweating, and her blanket was twisted into a mess at her feet.

Aang was standing just in front of her, holding a tray with her breakfast on it. He'd even laid a rose next to her plate. Katara stammered. How much of that had she been yelling out loud?

"Zuko?" Aang whispered. He slammed the tray down on her bed and stormed out of the tent.

Katara didn't have the heart to call after him. Instead, she gingerly picked up the small, folded note he'd placed under the rose.

I still love you. And I'll never stop.

Her throat caught.

"I'm sorry." She choked out, crumpling the paper into the palm of her hand. "I'm so sorry."


	7. Chapter 7

Dark Side of the Sun

Dark Side of the Sun

Chapter Seven

Zuko rested his arm on the frame of the sattle, staring out through the clouds. Appa was flying at a leisurely pace, which vastly contrasted with Zuko's racing heart.

They were almost to the seaport.

"You okay?" Katara asked, settling down next to him. He nodded, even though he was far from okay. He hadn't seen his mom in so long…would he even recognize her if he saw her?

"When you found out where your mom was, I knew we were going to go. I would've come with you even if everyone else had stayed in the Fire Nation." Katara continued softly. "I know how it feels to be away for someone for that long. I know how much you must've missed her." She hesitated. "My dad left a year after my mom died."

Surprised, Zuko turned to face her. "He left?"

"For the war." Katara fixed her gaze on the scenery. "My brother and Gran-Gran were supposed to take care of me, but--" She bit her lip. "It was…kind of the other way around."

So that was why she was so motherly. Zuko nodded.

"And, I mean--I was so upset. He completely abandoned us. And then, while we were in Ba Sing Sei, his fleet of ships docked nearby. I could've gone to see him, but…I didn't. I told Sokka he could go. When I finally saw my dad again, I thought I'd be so happy, but--I couldn't be. I was so angry at him for what he'd done. I'd forgiven him, but seeing him again just brought up all those feelings. It was so painful. Losing my mother made me need him more than ever, and just when I was the most attached and the most vulnerable he left me."

Even though Katara was talking about her father, Zuko couldn't help but remember what he'd done to her in the Crystal Catacombs. How he'd betrayed her.

"I'm sorry." Zuko said softly. He paused, then placed his hand on the small of her back. Thrown, Katara tore her gaze from the clouds and looked at him. For a second, there was silence, and everything around them seemed to melt away.

"Aang, Zuko's petting Katara!" Toph yelled. Reality hit with a jolt, and Zuko pulled his hand away. Aang snapped his head around to look at them.

Innocently, Zuko held up his hands like he was being arrested. Aang glared at him.

"We were just talking. Don't have a heart attack." Zuko said. Aang glared at him for a minute, then turned back to focus on their destination.

Zuko and Katara eyed each other nervously.

The seaport smelled overwhelmingly like fish. Katara practiced breathing through her mouth as she made her way through the crowds of vendors, customers, and sightseers.

"This place smells terrible!" Sokka yelled, waving away a man who was trying to sell him a fish-kabob. "Usually I like the smell of anything edible, but this is AWFUL!"

"No duh." Mai answered irritably. Ever since her conversation with Zuko, she'd been increasingly moody. A man offered her a bag of clams and she almost stabbed him.

"How're you going to find your mother?" Katara asked Zuko, who was a few feet ahead of them, pushing his way through the crowd at an admirable pace.

"I don't know. I'll ask around." But it was becoming clear he wasn't planning on trying this anytime soon. He ignored everyone he passed. Most of them were content with observing from afar, anyway, pointing at his scar and whispering to their friends.

"Who's that?"

"Oww, that looks so painful!"

"He's kinda hot."

"Are you kidding me? His skin is all, like, burnt off!"

"Shh! He can hear you!"

Stony-faced, Zuko pushed past the crowd of awestruck girls and stormed towards a slightly less crowded street.

"Where are we going?" Katara called out. Zuko turned to look back at her, and walked right into someone. The woman dropped the packages she was holding.

"Sorry." Zuko mumbled, bending down to help her pick up her things. The woman's son helped as well, taking a loaf of bread and a package of fish back to his father.

Zuko straightened up to give the packages to the woman--and froze. There was a long pause. He stared at her, stunned.

"Thank you," The woman said, taking her things out of his arms. She had long black hair and kind eyes, and even though she seemed fairly young, her face had too many lines on it. Zuko didn't respond. There was another pause.

"Do I know you?" The woman asked finally, shifting awkwardly under his gaze. Zuko opened his mouth slightly, as if he wanted to say something, but he didn't. The woman's husband put a hand on her shoulder.

"Come on," He said, leading the woman away.

Zuko stood in tense silence, watching her leave with a strange expression on his face. No one spoke for a while.

"Was that…" Katara trailed off hesitantly, knowing the answer already. Zuko stood still for a minute longer, then cleared his throat.

"Okay. Let's keep going." He said in a tight voice. No one hesitated to follow him. Katara wanted to reach out to Zuko, to comfort him, but…she didn't.

She was afraid he would simply push her away.


	8. Chapter 8

Dark Side of the Sun

Dark Side of the Sun

Chapter Eight

They made camp just outside the seaport once it started to get dark, constructing a fire and cooking the cleanest fish they could find. It was a quiet meal. No one spoke much, except to say things like "Nice night, isn't it?" and "This fish isn't so bad." Zuko was the first to leave the group, retreating to his tent and shutting himself inside. Again, Katara wanted to help him, but something was holding her back. Reluctantly, she stayed where she was.

"Okay," Sokka said, once Zuko was gone. "What is going on here? Why is everyone so angsty all of a sudden? Did I miss something?"

"Yeah," Katara answered. "Zuko's mom."

Sokka looked surprised. "You found her?"

"That lady who dropped her packages. It was her."

"But--" Sokka's eyes narrowed. "She had a family."

"Exactly." Katara stared into the flames. "And she didn't recognize him."

Sokka let out a low whistle. "That's harsh."

Katara nodded halfheartedly. One of the sticks in the fire snapped, slowly turning to black ash. She watched flakes of it drift to the ground.

"He'll be fine." Aang said. "He's been through worse."

Looking up, Katara couldn't tell if he'd said this out of anger or sympathy.

"So have I." She whispered softly. He didn't seem to hear her.

The cloth ceiling of the tent.

Zuko had been staring at it for almost an hour now, listening to his friends talking about him around the bonfire. He couldn't shake the feeling that they didn't understand at all, except for--

He closed his eyes. Katara. Who else. She understood him more than anyone he'd met, more even than his uncle, Iroh. More than his girlfriend, Mai. More than his Mother.

It was still sinking in that she was married to someone else, with another son. She'd replaced him. Didn't she think he was going to come back some day? That he would try to find her?

She didn't, Zuko thought, because she knew she was leaving behind the Fire Nation. And that he'd be raised there, taught that she was a traitor. She didn't expect him to leave his whole life behind to find her, his Mother, who'd abandoned him.

But he had.

Zuko thought of his father, in jail, telling the guards where she was. He'd known. He'd told Zuko because he knew what would happen. It was sick, but this pain was all his father could manage from where he was. He'd been defeated, but he still wanted the last laugh.

You got it, Dad, Zuko thought.

This is what you wanted.

"Zuko?"

He opened his eyes. Katara was standing in the entryway of his tent, nervously biting her lip. "I know it's late, but--"

"I wasn't sleeping." Zuko sat up. "What is it?"

"Nothing. I just thought…you might want to talk."

Zuko smiled weakly. "Sure."

Katara sat down on the bed next to him. They were both silent for a while.

"I think you're the only one who understands me." Zuko said finally. "Everyone says they know me, that they get me, but they have no idea what I'm going through. What I've been through. I know Aang had a lot of responsibility, being the Avatar and all--but at least he was raised by people who loved him. And they were good people. I had to break out of how I was raised, because even though so many people told me it was right, somehow I knew it wasn't. None of you had to deal with that. It's so hard to find out that you've been living a lie all your life, that everything you've been taught is wrong. You feel like you don't even know who you are anymore. And when you finally find yourself again, finally feel safe and loved and--good--something happens that throws it all off again."

"Like seeing your mother.' Katara added quietly. Zuko nodded.

"I feel like--I thought she loved me. I thought she'd--I don't know--wait for me. I had this picture in my head of finding her again, that she'd be so happy, that it'd be just like it was before she left. It was stupid of me to think that she'd put her life on hold until I came back, but somehow I just thought it'd be…different. Not like this."

Katara nodded slowly. "Sometimes we expect things that don't make sense, just because we don't want to see it any other way. When we try to see it logically, there's always some contradiction or flaw, and we reject it. If what you wanted had happened, and everything had gone back to how it was, you would've gone to stay with her. So you'd have left us. There's always something wrong, something out of place, which is why so many people try to live in a fantasy where everything works out in the end." She smiled faintly. "I know I do."

Without thinking, Zuko put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her into a hug. They stayed like that for a while, just sitting there, comforted. When they finally pulled away, Katara was surprised to see that Zuko's eyes were wet with tears.

"Don't tell them, but I cry too." He whispered. They both smiled. Katara felt a warmth spreading through her, an indescribable euphoria that she both loved and hated at the same time. It was wrong. It was all incredibly, horribly wrong.

But it felt so right.


	9. Chapter 9

Dark Side of the Sun

Dark Side of the Sun

Chapter Nine

"We're going out today," Katara announced brightly as Sokka stumbled groggily out of his tent. Aang was already beside her, fully dressed and smiling. It had been a somewhat sudden change in attitude for him, but Katara suspected that Zuko's newfound misery had something to do with his happy-go-lucky persona.

"Why?" Sokka groaned, rubbing his eyes. "There's nothing to do here. The whole place smells like fish."

"We're getting breakfast. There's a shop nearby that sells pastries."

"And who's going to pay for that?" Someone asked. Katara turned to see Zuko walking towards them, smirking with newfound confidence. She tried not to blush.

"Well, seeing as we're broke…?" Katara raised an eyebrow hopefully. He grinned.

"I must admit, being a prince does come with perks." He jerked his thumb back, towards his tent. "I've got a bunch of coins stashed under your sleeping bag, which is very warm, by the way."

Both Katara and Zuko froze simultaneously as Sokka's eyebrows shot up.

"What--"

"That came out wrong." Zuko said quickly, his confidence dropping to a kind of panicked awkwardness. "I didn't mean--In the fire nation, I'm used to it being really warm, so I was cold and Katara--leant her sleeping bag to me. It wasn't like--you know. Sorry."

Katara tried very hard not to laugh.

Breakfast was delicious, and mercifully not made of fish. Mai was the only one who barely touched her food, and Katara suspected she'd overheard their conversation that morning. The very idea of it made her embarrassed and pleased at the same.

Even though nothing had actually happened, it was humorous (in a sort of twisted way) to see Mai thinking something had.

"So, what are we doing today?" Suki asked, running her fingers through her hair. When no one replied, Katara realized everyone was waiting for her to answer.

"I don't know. What do you want to do?"

She shrugged. "I don't know. What's there to do at a seaport?"

"We could um…steal some precious scrolls." Sokka mumbled.

"Or I could tie you to a tree and bait you with your mother's necklace." Zuko added.

"Pirates." Aang coughed.

The three of them laughed. Katara scowled, her face burning.

"Well, we could all sit around and laugh at Zuko while his ship gets stolen." She shot back. Zuko looked surprised.

"Oh, it's on." He stood up, smiling.

"Are you challenging me?" Katara asked, getting to her feet.

"Maybe."

They faced each other, hands raised.

"Funny, I thought even a prince stupid enough to let his own ship set sail would know not to fight me."

"Funny, I thought even a girl stupid enough to trust her enemy when he said he'd 'save her from the pirates' would know not to fight ME."

"I didn't trust you! You kidnapped me!"

"Oh, and what a fight you put up! You can wipe out a whole team of Dai Li agents but you can't hold off one teenage boy?"

There was a long, tense silence, and Zuko realized he'd said too much.

"That was different." She said slowly, her voice low and calm. "I was ready for the Dai Li. I was expecting a fight. You took me by surprise."

Zuko's head swam with contradictions. Her story didn't make sense. She'd been fighting the pirates for at least five minutes before he showed up. If she'd been able to escape from them, why hadn't she done the same with Zuko? He itched to ask her, but he could feel the others' eyes burning into them, skepticism clouding the room.

"Right," He managed to say. "Sorry." He dropped his hands and awkwardly sat back down. Sensing that their fight was over, Katara did the same.

"Katara?" Aang asked finally. She looked over at him.

"Yeah?"

"I'm tired. I think I'm just going to rest today."

"Okay."

He stood up and left the shop, making his way back towards camp. Stiffly, Mai followed him. Katara watched them go, a sense of foreboding creeping into her stomach.

She wondered, vaguely, if things would ever work out.


End file.
